How to Catch a Frog: and Other Stories of Family, Love, Dysfunction, Survival, and DIY by Heather Ross
Heather Ross grew up in a very dysfuctional and unconventional home. She never learned what a happy marriage looked like, how to pay bills, or the importance of a career to support yourself. Many of the adults in her life never worked and the priorities were keeping beer and cigarettes in stock not food. Heather and her twin sister Christie were born on land in Vermont that their grandfather owned. Their parents split up shortly after their birth and they lived with their mother who was supported monetarily by her father. As an adult Heather quickly begins to realize just how much she was neglected as a child and how different her upbringing was from most of her peers. How to Catch a Frog is a collection of stories from Heather's childhood into adulthood and becoming a parent herself. The stories are interesting, but in my opinion they get better and better as the book goes on. The later half of the stories are from when Heather is an adult trying to figure out her life.
I laughed out loud when I read this quote in the book:
[After finding out she's pregnant] "The next day I called my father, who was genuinely thrilled for me. This gave me new hope and motivated me to get dressed and walk to the bookstore, where I bought a stack of books about pregnancy and newborns. They sat next to me, in a neat pile, on the table. Every few days I would try to pick one up and read through whatever chapter seemed relevant to me at that stage, but I would instantly feel such a bitter anxiety beginning to grow out of the pit of my stomach and into my chest that I would have to put the book down immediately and reach for the remote control. I watched episode after episode of 16 and Pregnant, each one filling me with a sense of competence that no book could provide." (p. 223)
Mary Coin by Marisa Silver (Books & Banter book club)
I really enjoyed this book. It creates a fictional story around the famous Dorothea Lange Depression photograph "Migrant Mother." The story is told from 3 people's perspectives - Mary Coin, the subject of the photograph, Vera Dare, the photographer, and Walker Dodge, who's family owns some of the citrus groves in California that hired migrant workers. All three of these people's lives are intertwined in ways they never expected. After reading about the famous photograph I realized that the author stayed true to the basic facts about the "Migrant Mother" in this story, she just adds fictionalized details to round out the story. I liked that it was told from 3 different perspectives because you got to see all sides of the same story. Overall, it was definitely an interesting book that highlights the incredible hardships many families endured during the Great Depression.
Guests on Earth by Lee Smith (book club)
I didn't really have any preconceived ideas of this book, but it wasn't great. The story follows Evalina Toussaint who was born to an exotic dancer in New Orleans. Her mother takes up with a married man and they have a child together, but after the child dies Evalina's mother commits suicide. Her married lover's family takes her in, but soon sends her off to the Highland Hospital in Asheville, NC. While Evalina is not mentally ill, she has obviously endured a lot in her short life. She does come to heal emotionally and mentally, but because she really has nowhere else to go she is in and out of Highland as both a patient and eventually a staff member for most of her life. The main thread of the story is Evalina's interactions with Zelda Fitzgerald who is also an on-again, off-again patient at Highland. But, Evalina doesn't have a lot of one-on-one interaction with Zelda - she does however make LOTS of friends with the various patients and staff that come through Highland. Many of the patients like her come back multiple times over the years. The story ends with a devastating fire that broke out and killed many patients at the hospital. After the fire Evalina is able to move on and goes back to New Orleans.
I think one of the things Smith is trying to point out is how many women during this time period were deemed "crazy" or "sick" that were really depressed housewives or abused in terrible ways, yet somehow at fault themselves. In Evalina's case her problem is that she's an orphan, not that she's mentally ill. I also didn't like how Evalina kind of played two guys at the hospital - one a doctor on staff and the other a patient. She was sleeping with them both and claimed to love them both, but neither of them knew about the other. You do like Evalina's character, but she does make some poor choices throughout the book. Overall, it was OK. I almost felt like a mental patient while reading it because it seemed all over the place and there were so many characters that it was hard to keep up with them all. I only read this book for my book club, and this is one that I wouldn't have missed if I hadn't read it.
North of Normal: a Memoir of My Wilderness Childhood, My Unusual Family, and How I Survived Both by Cea Sunrise Person
Cea Person was born when her mother was only 17. She and her mother moved with her mother's parents and siblings into the Canadian wilderness living in Tipis on Indian land - sometimes with permission and sometime without. Cea's grandparents were true hippies and there was constant sex and drugs EVERYWHERE when she was growing up. Everyone in the family was mentally ill or a drug addict. When Cea was 5 she and her mother moved to be with her mother's boyfriend Karl. Karl made a living either growing and selling pot or robbing lake vacation cabins. When Cea starts school she quickly realizes how unconventional her home life is. She has to beg her mother to put clothes on and not smoke pot when she invites friends over. When Cea is 8 her mother takes up with a new boyfriend, Barry, who molests Cea - and her mother knows but does nothing about it. By the time Cea is 13 she is done with her crazy family. She enters a modeling contest and wins and that begins a 20 year international modeling career. Even though she has escaped her chaotic home life the dysfunction has taken a toll. She has 2 failed marriages before she finally finds true, functional love. By the end of the book she has also managed to forge new relationships with her parents and has 3 children of her own.
While reading this it obviously reminded me of The Glass Castleby Jeannette Walls, and in the acknowledgments at the end of the book Cea thanks Jeannette Walls for writing The Glass Castle since that gave her the courage to write her own story too. But, I think Jeannette Walls life seems like a fairy tale compared to Cea's - her life was beyond chaotic and there was a lot of sexual abuse and dysfunction that really messed her up for a long time. It's an incredible story made more incredible by the fact that it's true. A must read for fans of The Glass Castle and similar books.
Burnt Toast Makes You Sing Good: a Memoir of Food & Love From an American Midwest Family by Kathleen Flinn
I wish I could give this book more than 5 stars - it was absolutely fantastic! I already loved Kathleen Flinn's other books, The Sharper Your Knife, the Less You Cry and The Kitchen Counter Cooking School, so I was VERY excited about this one because she explores her family history and where her love of cooking and food comes from. Kathleen was the youngest of 5 children and her parents were both from large families. When Kathleen's parents were first starting out they didn't have a lot of money, so they always had a large garden and kept chickens for awhile. Kathleen's mother canned fruit and vegetables they grew and always made homemade bread. One of the funniest scenes in the book is when Kathleen's older sister convinces her mother to buy TV dinners for them, she was jealous of friends who ate them regularly. When they made them they were all disgusted by the food since they were so used to the homemade, home grown food! This book is at times hilarious and at times heartbreaking. It's amazing some of the things her family went through, but no matter what they never let circumstances beat them down. They all loved each other and her parents were so proud of all their children. You can also clearly see how Kathleen's love of food comes from generations of great home cooks. She also includes plenty of recipes from her family as well. This is one of the best food and family memoirs I've ever read. Kathleen Flinn does an amazing job with this book. I can't wait to see what she writes next!
The Big Tiny: a Build-it-Myself Memoir by Dee Williams
When Dee Williams was diagnosed with a heart condition it made her re-evaluate her life and her priorities. A few years earlier she had bought her first house, but it was a constant money pit and time suck. When she happened upon an article about a man who built a tiny house and lived in the backyard of his "big" house that he rented out, she immediately contacted the guy and went out to visit him and his tiny house. After that she decided to build her own tiny house even though she had virtually no construction experience. After selling her house and moving into the new tiny house full time Dee finally feels "at home." She now co-owns a business helping people design and build their own tiny houses and does speaking engagements with her tiny house in tow.
While I appreciate her re-evaluation of her life and priorities, I don't know that I could live in such a tiny house. It is very impressive that she built this whole house with no experience. Overall, I did like the book, but I wasn't blown away.
The Roommates: True Tales of Friendship, Rivalry, Romance, and Disturbingly Close Quarters by Stephanie Wu
I just happened to flip through this book at the library and it looked pretty funny so I decided to check it out. Ironically, I've never had a roommate other than my husband which is completely different. Some of the stories are hilarious, some are sad, and some are happy endings with the roommate becoming a best friend or even spouse. It was definitely an entertaining and quick read, most of the stories are only 2-3 pages long. Overall, it was a fun, quick read.
