April 2019 Reviews

Undaunted: surviving Jonestown, summoning courage, and fighting back by Jackie Speier

I wasn't familiar with Jackie Speier's name, but am fascinated with anything about Jonestown which is why I picked up this book. Speier started volunteering for California state assemblyman Leo Ryan when she was sixteen helping with his re-election campaign. Eventually she interned with him while she was in college and even followed him to Washington, DC when he was elected to Congress. She eventually became his legislative counsel after she finished law school. It was while she was in that role that she accompanied Congressman Ryan to Jonestown in Guyana to investigate claims from family members of people in the cult. Of course this is where the story gets familiar, she is with Ryan when their group is ambushed by Jonestown "security" and she is shot 5 times. She somehow survives 22 hours with no medical attention before finally being airlifted back to the US. After months of surgeries and physical recovery Speier is healed enough to go home. But her experience in Jonestown would mark her life forever - reinforcing her belief to stay in politics and try to help people as she saw Congressman Ryan do. Speier grew up in a long line of strong women and her survival in Jonestown is partially because of the strength she drew from her family. This memoir explores how service and politics shaped Speier's life and how despite many obstacles thrown in her path she has still continued to persevere. Her life (which is far from over) is a testament to feminism and her career has paved the way for many other women to benefit in her wake. An inspiring memoir of a memorable and pioneering woman.

Some quotes I liked:

"After race riots roiled through much of the largely African American neighborhood of Watts, Los Angeles, Ryan briefly took a job as a substitute teacher in one of the poorest schools in the community. He wanted to have real conversations with the students, parents, and educators. What he learned from that experience found its way into legislation the following season. Then in 1970, as chairman of a committee overseeing prison reform, he had listened to inmates talk about the subhuman conditions in California prisons. So, under a pseudonym, he had himself booked, strip-searched, and incarcerated for ten days at Folsom State Prison to get an unvarnished perspective of the criminal justice system in California. He only revealed his identity when it was time to be released. A couple of the prisoners appreciated his efforts. He treated them as equals, and ideally he would help pass legislation to improve their living conditions (which he later did)." (p. 36)

"The congressman wanted answers [about Jonestown]. No argument or threat would have been able to deter him...Politically, there was nothing to gain - and everything to lose - by taking on Jim Jones, who was reportedly a live wire of the most dangerous variety. There was no telling what he'd do if confronted and challenged. Still, none of those red flags made the congressman pause or reconsider. Ryan didn't care about doing what was popular, and he didn't pay much mind to doing what others deemed safe. He cared about doing what he thought was right. Never one to accept thirdhand information or be dissuaded by hearsay, he confirmed that he was going to embark on a fact-finding - and potentially lifesaving - trip after the November election, to check on the constituents who had followed Jones into the Guyanese jungle." (p. 49)

"A campaign consultant once advised me, with the best of intentions, to not be so focused on women, that doing so would only alienate men. But I responded, and still believe, 'If women don't do it, who will?' If a woman avoids taking on the cause of women, who do we expect to affect change? Should we leave it to men to fight for our equal pay?" (p. 170)

The Last Ballad by Wiley Cash (Books & Banter and Evening Edition)

In 1929 Ella May Wiggins works 12-hour days, six days a week in a dirty, dangerous job in a textile mill in Gastonia, NC making $9 a week. She has 4 children and one on the way and her husband, who never liked to work much to begin with, has walked away leaving her to try to find a way to support everyone by herself. When she sees a union flyer she decides to check it out mainly out of desperation for something better for her family. Her decision to go to that first union rally will quickly shape the rest of Ella May's life. Told from several character's perspectives, The Last Balladtells Ella May's story - which is based on true events, as well as the plight of poor working class people (both white and black) in a time before many workplace protection laws were in place. Cash does a great job with all the characters and telling the story from their perspective and while at first you're not sure why all of the characters are introduced everything comes together in the end to give a very well-rounded story. 

Some quotes I liked:

"Ella wasn't pretty, not like that girl. Pretty took the will to be so and the money to do it and the time to see to it and the sleep to maintain it, and Ella didn't have any of those things." (p. 6)

"...it was this past and present of find industrialization that Richard wanted the Lytles to understand marked him and his family as being one of its most wealthy and famous. While the Lytles' ancestors had sipped juleps on the veranda and overseen the work of enslaved black bodies in brackish water, Richard's father and grandfather had moved mountains, electrified production, cared for the poor, and changed the state forever." (p. 190)

The Bucolic Plague by Josh Kilmer-Purcell

Josh Kilmer-Purcell and his partner Brent Ridge decide somewhat on a whim to buy an old farm/mansion in upstate New York as their vacation home. They both work in New York City and want somewhere to get away on the weekends. Both Josh and Brent grew up in more rural areas and Josh spent much of his childhood not appreciating his family's huge garden and summer canning. Josh works in advertising and Brent works for the Martha Stewart TV show. Josh is getting tired of working in advertising which is more of a young person's game. As he is getting closer to 40 he wants to get back to his roots and garden and can and do more for himself on the Beekman farm. Josh puts in a vegetable garden at the Beekman and they hire a caretaker who comes with a herd of 80 goats. In an attempt to help use up all the goat's milk they start making soap and when they give some to Martha Stewart and she features it on her TV show the Beekman 1802 company is born. But, it's very difficult to run a farm and soap business while still working full time in the city. Then the economic collapse of 2009 happens and Brent and Josh are both out of work with two mortgages and all the work of the farm to manage as well. If you're familiar with the brand you know they managed to pull it out of the fire and keep both the Beekman business and farm. Josh is a great writer and the book is hilarious, but he is also honest about how hard things were around the time of the economic collapse and how the farm started to create problems in his relationship with Brent. Overall, an honest and hilarious look at two city slickers who made a (successful) go at farming.

Some quotes I liked:

"Ever since Martha mentioned that she'd like to visit the farm, Brent had been seeing everything through her eyes. And when one peers through Martha glasses, the world isn't rose colored. It's a great big collection of disappointing imperfections." (p. 169)

"I'd come to realize that while most Americans don't have any idea what actually happens on a farm, they all think they do. Having spent hours as children with their Fisher-Price farms and pull-string toys that make animal noises, people have created a tableau of farm life in their heads that couldn't be further from reality. They envision Brent and me spending our weekends driving a big red tractor aimlessly around the barnyard, taking breaks to milk things and perhaps tote a bale of hay somewhere. Fisher-Price seems to ensure that every little kid grows up with a false perception of the lives of firemen, policemen, and farmers. Maybe if they made more accounting office play sets and little middle management figures, they'd hit the mark better - or at least be more demographically accurate." (p. 212-13)

[When Brent is laid off from the Martha Stewart TV show after spending Labor Day weekend traveling with her for the show] "'You mean you just spent two days with her, flying on the jet and eating meals together, and she never mentioned that you were going to be let go the minute you got back to New York?' 'Martha doesn't really handle layoffs.' [Brent responded] I find myself growing enraged...She never once e-mailed or called Brent after his layoff. In all my years as an employee, and later as a manager and partner, I have never let a terminated colleague disappear without privately acknowledging her or his contributions, and offering to help in any way that I could. For a woman who has publicly lamented her lack of friends, it's hard to believe that her sixty-nine years of human interaction haven't illuminated the cause." (p. 231 & 236)

Blessed are the Misfits by Brant Hansen

Brant Hansen has Asperger syndrome, is an introvert, and has rarely "felt" God's presence in his life, but is still a Believer and in this book he sets out to show us that misfits like him are not second-class Christians. If you've struggled to fit in with the Christian culture then this is the book for you. There is a place for everyone in the Church, but often if you're not an extrovert who loves talking to strangers or getting up on stage and singing in front of huge congregations you can feel left out or less than. Hansen gives countless examples of how Jesus not only accepted outcasts and misfits, but actively sought them out and made them part of his inner circle. Hansen also gives ways that spiritual misfits CAN get involved in their local church and community in ways that work with their personality, not against it. While nothing in this book was a huge surprise for me, I think it's a good reminder for Christians that there are all kinds of people and God calls us to love everyone - not just the people who are just like us. 

Some quotes I liked:

"Jesus is exactly what I would hope God would be: a blunt-speaking, underdog-loving, field-leveling, jaw-droppingly brilliant, authority-challenging, short-story-telling, self-sacrificing, bring-the-children-to-Me...healer. And if there's a God, and this is what God is like...this is incredibly good news." (p. 26)

"But that's just it: we have to struggle. It's striking how often people think that a longstanding, ongoing struggle against a particular temptation means they are somehow failing. No. You're not failing. The struggle means God is still working in you. Do not stop struggling. We should expect struggle as part of the Christian life." (p. 129)

I'll Be There For You: the one about Friends by Kelsey Miller

I have fond memories of watching the TV show Friends with my best friend in high school on my tiny TV in my bedroom. So, when I saw this book and realized that Kelsey Miller was the author I knew it would be good. Miller explores the phenomenon of Friends - how the idea was born, how the cast was selected, and how it blew up and shaped our culture. The background of the show was really interesting and how the cast truly became friends in real life. It was also interesting to read about how the cast really banded together and used that to negotiate fair and equal salaries - something that was unheard of at the time. Today Friends is nostalgia for a lot of people "comfort food TV" as it was described in the book. While I loved Friends when it was first on the air and rooted for Ross and Rachel to get together, after awhile I just lost interest in the show and I think it went on longer than it should have just because of how much money it was making. People rip on Jerry Seinfeld for turning down $110 million for a tenth season of Seinfeld, but it is better to "go out on a high note" as he did and not let the show drag on until it's just dumb. Unfortunately I think that's what happened with Friends, but it's still wildly popular more than 15 years off the air and this book explains why that is. Overall, even though I'm not a die-hard Friends fan anymore this was still a nice trip down memory lane.

Some quotes I liked:

"That's what struck Wild during the shoot. 'It was much more like being with a band than being with a TV cast,' he said. However, 'I've never seen a cast, and very rarely seen a band, stick together to the degree they did.' Wild had been a music writer for years before covering television, and noticed that, yes, the Friends did appear to genuinely like one another - but more importantly, they seemed to recognize how much they needed each other. They had to function as a group or else things could go sour fast. They spent meals together, watched the show together on Thursday nights, and did all the promotional photos as a group." (p. 91)

"No television ensemble had ever negotiated as a group, nor had any cast ever had such power at the bargaining table. If they were serious about this all-for-one-one-for-all approach, then they could walk away and take the entire show with them. Headlines lit up with reports of the Friendscast banding together to make these startling demands, and threatening to strike if they weren't met. It wasn't just trade publications, either, but mainstream outlets from Us Weeklyto the Washington Post. Historically, the general public wouldn't have even known, let alone cared, about the details of television contract negotiations. But this one had become both tabloid gossip and national news." (p. 126)

"Some say [Friends] jumped the shark when Ross said 'Rachel' at the alter, instead of 'Emily,' Others cite the Vegas episode, when the two of them got drunk and married. But those were fairly standard plot twists in the soap opera of Ross and Rachel. The truth is, when compared to other shows, Friends never really jumped the shark - but it came pretty close. It put on water skis and got in the ocean. It had nothing to do with Rachel and Ross, though. The Friendsshark was Rachel and Joey." (p. 190-91)

Roar: thirty stories one roar by Cecelia Ahern

You've probably heard the line, "I am woman, hear me roar." from the 1972 song by Helen Reddy and Ray Burton. In Cecelia Ahern's hilarious and clever book she lets us hear 30 women roar by writing short stories based on cliches used to describe women or issues women struggle with. Some of the topics include women disappearing as they get older, women's roles vs. men's roles (pink vs. blue), being pigeonholed, being eaten up with guilt, reproductive rights, etc. While I didn't love every single story, the majority were FABULOUS. Ahern did an incredible job of taking topics or cliches and turning them around in such a pointed, yet hilarious way. This is definitely one of the best books I've read this year so far. Great job Cecelia Ahern!

Outer Order Inner Calm: declutter and organize to make more room for happiness by Gretchen Rubin

I really like Gretchen Rubin and while this book is very different from her other books she still uses some of the principles from her other books to inform this one. She found through her research about happiness that often outer order helps create inner calm - hence the title of this book. What I really like is that unlike many other organizing books this one is not focusing on minimalism. Rubin understands that organization is not the same for everyone. I also really liked that she focused on having your home reflect who you are, so cleaning and organizing so that the things that are important to you are what you see every day. This book is a really quick read and each section is full of quick 1-2 page tips about creating outer order for inner calm. The five areas Rubin covers are 1) Make Choices, 2) Create Order, 3) Know Yourself - and Others, 4) Cultivate Helpful Habits, and 5) Add Beauty. This is a book I could see myself referring back to, so it might be one I buy. If you're wanting to clear clutter and be more organized, but you're NOT a minimalist - this is a great book for you.

March 2019 Reviews

Whitewash: the story of a weed killer, cancer, and the corruption of science by Carey Gillam

I already knew Monsanto was the devil, but if you want even more confirmation and the facts to back it up this is the book for you. Gillam was an agricultural journalist who when she started was impressed with Monsanto staff and used Roundup liberally herself at home. But soon she started seeing a darker side and started digging into claims that Roundup is not as safe as Monsanto claimed and in fact was unbelievably dangerous and carcinogenic. In Whitewash she mainly covers how Monsanto has routinely paid scientists or writers to paint their products in a good light - even when reputable science disputes those claims. Gillam also delves into how corrupt the EPA, USDA, and other government entities are that are supposed to be watchdogs for the public - these agencies are routinely filled with former and current chemical company executives who are obviously not looking out for public interest, but for their own pockets. While often infuriating to read, this book just further proves that money rules the world. Monsanto doesn't care if their product destroys the world because they are raking in the money and paying off or suing anyone who gets in their way. Hopefully as more and more books like this come out people will start to realize chemicals are NOT the path to quality, healthy food and enough people will demand change in these supposedly protecting government agencies.

Lots of great quotes in this book:

"U.S. farmers alone applied more than 276 million pounds [of glyphosate] in 2014, compared with 40 million pounds in 1995, according to published research, and use globally has more than doubled in just the past ten years. Around the globe, glyphosate is now registered for use in 130 countries and is manufactured by dozens of producers following Monsanto's lead. It is considered the most heavily used agricultural chemical in history." (p. 4)

"Both the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) and the U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA) annually test thousands of food products for hundreds of different types of pesticide residues, but both routinely have refused to test for glyphosate. It's also notable that as the USDA and FDA have been declining to test for glyphosate residues over the past twenty years, the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency (EPA), which regulates pesticides, has been approving industry requests for higher and higher allowable levels of glyphosate residues in food." (p. 5)

"Don Huber, professor emeritus of plant pathology at Purdue University, believes that glyphosate may be even more toxic than DDT. 'Future historians may well look back on our time and write about us...how willing we were to sacrifice our children and jeopardize future generations based on false promises and flawed science just to benefit the bottom line of a commercial enterprise..." (p. 20)

"...Henry Rowlands, who launched the Detox Project in California to test food and bodily fluids for glyphosate residues...Rowlands said he found quickly that glyphosate is such a hot-button issue that even trying to find independent laboratories to run tests is a challenge. All but two of the American labs he sought out to help launch large-scale testing declined. More than 350 turned him down...'I'm certain it was political,' Rowlands told me in a call from Bulgaria. 'All of these labs tset for big food producers. They aren't going to risk their bottom line looking for something food companies don't want people to find. It's really sad. They're not protecting public health.'" (p. 62)

"In fact, roughly 85 percent of more than 10,000 food samples tested by the USDA in 2015 carried pesticide residues. Most of those foods were fruits and vegetables, both fresh and processed - food consumers generally consider healthy...even residues of chemicals long banned in the United States were found as recently as 2015, including residues of DDT or its metabolites found in spinach and potatoes." (p. 69)

"Monsanto Company, Dow Agrosciences, DuPont, Syngenta, and others snapped up leases for large swaths of property [in Hawaii] over the past several decades and have transformed areas known for sugar and pineapple production into experimental field sites. By 2014, the chemical companies controlled more than 13,500 acres on the island of Kauai alone. Across the state, including on the islands of Maui, Molokai, and Oahu, the companies occupied about 25,000 of the states's 280,000 acres of agricultural land." (p. 135)

"One analysis of government pesticide databases and data from the Hawaii Department of Agriculture released in 2014 showed that the agrochemical industry was applying pesticides at higher rates on Kauai than the application rates on most U.S. farms. That report described the west side of Kauai as 'one of the most toxic chemical environments in all of American agriculture.'" (p. 139)

[Due to so much interest in GMOs and corruption government officials are now using fake email accounts to avoid having to turn over damning evidence in litigation or Freedom of Information Act requests]
"Still, an investigation by the Associated Press found that many government officials use these secret e-mail accounts in ways that complicate an agency's legal responsibilities to find and turn over e-mails in response to congressional or internal investigations, civil lawsuits, or public records requests." (p. 230) 

"'Innovation does not happen without the courage to question the current paradigm,' said Jonathan Lundgren, the former USDA scientist who left the agency when he felt his scientific findings were being sacrificed for political purposes. 'If we do not change our behavior, then humans are in trouble. We know what needs to be done to solve these problems that our planet and species are facing. What is lacking is the courage to implement the needed changes.' Let's find that courage." (p. 248) [The last paragraph of the book perfectly sums up what needs to be done.]

Butter: a rich history by Elaine Khosrova

This was an interesting and quick read all about the history of butter. It covers how butter has been made historically all over the world and also to some current, artisan butter makers out there now. She also covers the role of women in butter making, butter tools & techniques, and how butter was demonized by some scientists as the reason for rising heart disease (spoiler - they were wrong). Khosrova really does a very thorough job of covering every aspect of butter. The second part of the book is tons of recipes involving butter - including how to make your own butter. Overall, definitely an interesting look at a commonplace, yet vital cooking ingredient.

A quote I liked:

"Eventually, the new momentum in dairy science coupled with old-world chauvinism would eradicate women's authority and place in the dairy world. But it happened incrementally, as each new technical innovation erased a portion of traditional butter making." (p. ??? somewhere in chapter 4 my ebook page numbers were not showing correctly)

The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas (Community Read - Books & Banter and Evening Edition book clubs)

Starr Carter already feels pulled between two worlds - her world at home in Garden Heights, the poor black neighborhood where she lives, and Williamson, the predominately white prep school she and her brothers attend. At home she can't act too "Williamson" and at school she can't act too "Garden Heights" and to make things even harder she is dating a white guy named Chris. One night she goes to a party in Garden City and accepts a ride home from her childhood friend Kahlil. On the way home they are pulled over and the officer makes Kahlil get out of the car, then when Kahlil opens the car door to check on Starr the officer shoots him in the back. Starr is the only witness, but is terrified of getting involved in the case. The media quickly makes Kahlil out to be a gang member and drug dealer and the police don't seem interested in Starr's account of that night, but the community want answers and want someone to pay for Kahlil's death. As Starr grieves for Kahlil, she also struggles with how to fight for him and whether or not she should get involved in the protests that often turn into riots. As her community protests for Kahlil they must also find a way to come together for everyone's benefit. A very timely novel that addresses some hard issues like race, community, oppression, and police-involved shootings.

A quote I liked:

"...Sometimes you can do everything right and things will still go wrong. The key is to never stop doing right." (p. 154)

Saving Tarboo Creek: one family's quest to heal the land by Scott Freeman

In 2004 Scott Freeman and his wife Susan (granddaughter of conservationist Aldo Leopold) bought 17 acres on Washington's Olympic Peninsula. Their land straddles Tarboo Creek, a 7.5 mile stream that had been degraded from channeling and clearcutting, but used to be a salmon run. They decide to restore their section of Tarboo Creek to its former salmon run glory. The book is half about their work restoring their portion of Tarboo Creek and half about conservation in general and why it's important work for everyone. It was a little more academic than I was expecting, but the parts about how they restored the creek and the land around it was really interesting. Freeman gives a few tips in the last chapter about how to live a more natural life - be engaged, be simple, be real, and be present. Advice that everyone could use in today's fast-paced, automated world. A quick read about an important topic.

Some quotes I liked:

"We find it repugnant when people exploit or abuse others for personal gain - we call them cheats, tyrants, scoundrels, or villains; we describe them as despicable, evil, vile, wicked or manipulative. Leopold said we should feel the same way about people who exploit or abuse land. If someone we meet is broken or damaged, we reach out to help them. If land is broken or damaged, we reach out to help it - by planting trees and native wildflowers." (p. 35)

"Based on more than a hundred years of data like these, the claim that hatcheries can make up for habitat loss is false. Knowing what we know now, hearing someone advocate for hatcheries is like listening to a doctor advise a patient that it's okay to eat junk food, abuse alcohol, sit all day, and chain smoke because we have state-of-the-art emergency rooms and ICUs that can solve any health problems that might result. But the jobs and sport fisheries supported by hatcheries have created a vested interest group that fights any attempt to close them...David Montgomery recognized the root of the problem: the success of hatcheries has always been measured in numbers of fry released, not the health of the populations they are supposed to be supplementing...If the money spent on hatcheries over the past 130 years had been spent on habitat protection and restoration instead, the situation would be far different today." (p. 80-1)

Pure: inside the Evangelical movement that shamed a generation of young women and how I broke free by Linda Kay Klein

Linda Klein grew up in an evangelical Christian church and experienced some very harmful messages about being a woman that impacted her traumatically for years after leaving the Church. A few years after starting to question the messages about women she grew up with, Klein decided to reach out to former friends that she attended church with to see what their experiences were and by doing so she basically opened up Pandora's box. She found an out-pouring of horror stories from young women who were experiencing PTSD-like symptoms around sex and relationships. It took her another 10 years to further sort through her own issues and trauma and work out what she really wanted to do with this book. Her main points are the purity culture of the Church is damaging to everyone, but especially girls/women and the Church really needs to figure out a better way to address healthy sexuality. While I didn't experience everything she did, I could definitely relate to how damaging the purity culture is. I don't know what the answer is, but I know it's not that. One thing that was hard for me was that many of the women (Klein included) have left the traditional/evangelical Church and either practice no religion or something that I would consider outside mainline Christianity. I think we need to find a middle ground between do whatever you want sexually and the Evangelical purity movement - something that deals with healthy sexuality and doesn't make women out to be the problem, but in a godly, Biblical way. It was so sad to see how often the stories in this book show church leaders taking the Bible so far out of context it was scary and shaming everyone into toeing the party line with a trail of destruction in their wake. This is a sad, but VERY important book. Thank you to Linda Klein for being brave enough to tell her own story and start digging into this horrible and destructive ideology.

Some quotes I liked:

"To summarize, first, the researchers are finding that purity teachings do not meaningfully delay sex. Second, they are finding that they do increase shame, especially among females. And third, they report that this increased shame is leading to higher levels of sexual anxiety, lower levels of sexual pleasure, and the feeling among those experiencing shame that they are stuck feeling this way forever. Oh, and it doesn't get better with time...it gets worse! Yep. Sounds about right." (p. 28)

"Reading these verses as an adult [Romans 14 verses about being a 'stumbling block'] I cannot help but shake my head - the whole time my childhood friends and I were being told that we were the stumbling blocks, our accusers were, even then, placing the real stumbling blocks before us: purity-based shaming and judgmentalism that pushed many of us right out of church...These stumbling blocks are: 1) the accusation that if purity culture doesn't work for you, it's you (not its teachings) that are the problem; 2) the requirement that all girls and women must perform a stereotypical gender role to be acceptable; 3) the expectation that all unmarried girls and women must maintain a sexless body, mind, and heart to be 'pure'; and 4) the systematic mishandling of sexual abuse cases and survivors." (p. 30)

"The cornerstone of the purity myth is the expectation that girls and women, in particular, will be utterly and absolutely nonsexual until the day they marry a man, at which point they will naturally and easily become his sexual satisfier, ensuring the couple will have children and never divorce: one man, one woman, in marriage, forever." (p. 77)

"By this I mean both that the purity movement classifies sexual violence by systematically silencing and hiding it, and that if and when it is exposed, the purity movement then misclassifies sexual violence as 'sex' rather than 'violence'...Equating survivors' actions, such as drinking in Laura's case, and perpetrators' actions, such as assault, is called sin-leveling, and is often categorized as a form of spiritual abuse." (p. 91)

"And after graduating from school, I had four or five avenues that I thought about as a vocation for myself, but I was just really looking for guidance from God: 'Where would you want me to be, God?' 'What if God was asking you the same question?' I asked. 'What if he was waiting for you to tell him what you wanted?' Katie laughed under her breath. 'It's funny because it really never occurred to me that maybe he was letting me choose. It never even occurred to me that he would be saying, 'And here's your life; do what you want.'"(p. 131)

"I have heard the tiger/lamb language many times since. Interviewees share about it being said from pulpits, in Bible studies, and in Christian counseling sessions. Somehow, purity culture has turned a pornographic fantasy about a virgin turned vamp into 'morality,' so that now both a woman's nonsexuality before marriage and her hypersexuality after marriage are required for her to be considered good." (p. 139)

"'I can't tell you what my daughters were taught in youth group,' Solange continued, picking her glass back up off the table. 'But I can tell you some of the results I saw: I saw them embarrassed about their feminine selves; I saw them more self-conscious about how they dressed and how they looked. They were just - I don't know. There was an underpinning of shame. When I read the Bible I see God's powerful love for women. I do not see in the Bible God treating women as second-class citizens, as little girls who aren't quite grown-up and will never be." (p. 153-4)

"Egalitarian women began organizing in the 1970s. In the eighties and nineties, complementarians fought back. Hard. Christian colleges that had embraced egalitarian thinking in the previous decades, for example, now fought to prove their commitment to complementarianism as demonstrated in their hiring practices, course offerings, and assignments. One of my interviewees even recalls having to write a college paper title 'Why Feminism is Wrong.' Tensions were particularly strong at Southern Seminary, the Southern Baptist Convention's flagship seminary. In the early to mid-1990s, the school made so-called women's issues a litmus test for whether or not a faculty member was conservative enough to teach there, its president calling them 'clear dividers in our time.'...Faculty hired before the new litmus test was put into place were now required to articulate a complementarian perspective if they wanted to keep their jobs...The seminary lost about a third of its faculty and half of its student body to the subsequent firings." (p. 162)

"I cannot help but wonder if, while some men worry that they are monsters because of this gender-based messaging, others may feel their monstrous behavior is justified because of it. When boys are repeatedly taught that they cannot control their sexual impulses and that it is a girl's responsibility to protect her own purity, how logical it must seem for perpetrators attempting to justify their actions to come to the conclusion that if a woman dresses or acts a certain way she is 'asking for it,' making rape at least partly (if not totally) her fault?" (p. 235-6)

Women Rowing North: navigating life's currants and flourishing as we age by Mary Pipher

In Women Rowing North Mary Pipher takes on the topic of women and aging. While the demographic she's focusing on is women who are 60+, I think it's still beneficial for any woman to read and think about. Pipher makes the case that women in this age-range are experiencing a lot of changes and have the opportunity to make the best of this time and grow or to retreat inward and refuse to grow. She covers topics from health issues, losing or dealing with a terminally ill spouse, issues with children, grandchildren, working/retiring, building a good day, and getting involved in volunteering and/or your local community. In every facet that she covers she reiterates the importance of building and maintaining relationships and how our attitude about these changes will greatly determine how good (or not) these final years are. She interviewed dozens of women for this book - some friends and some strangers. All of these women have unique stories and are working through these issues currently. Overall, it was a very interesting book about an important topic for women.

Some quotes I liked:

"As with Reviving Ophelia, this book explores a specific life stage from a feminist perspective, revealing the reality of women's lives as opposed to the dominant cultural stories about us. We are much more complicated, intense, and fascinating than most of America's stories suggest. Our culture presents us with a misogynistic version of who we older women are. We confront both ageism and gender-specific challenges. As we age, our bodies, our sexuality, and our minds are devalued...Contrary to cultural stereotypes, many older women are deeply happy. A 2014 Brookings Institute study on happiness and age found that people are least happy in their twenties, thirties, and early forties, and steadily gain an appreciation for life as they age. Indeed, most women become increasingly happy after age fifty-five, with their peak of happiness toward the very end of life." (p. 4)

"This may be the most important thing - that we learn to grant ourselves mercy. That we forgive ourselves, that we accept our pain, mistakes, and vulnerability, and somehow manage to love ourselves and our own lives. Most of us do make progress in this area; all of us can make more. And it is only when we grant ourselves mercy that we can extend this mercy to others." (p. 158)

Eager: the surprising, secret life of beavers and why they matter by Ben Goldfarb

I always thought beavers were fascinating animals, but as Ben Goldfarb's book shows they are not only interesting, but necessary to our ecosystems. Beavers are "keystone animals" that "supports an entire ecosystem...pull the keystone out, and the arch - or the ecosystem - collapses." (p. 55-6) Over and over Goldfarb shows examples of how when beavers are over-trapped or exterminated the ecosystem collapses with devastating consequences, but the good news is that by bringing beavers back into areas they can actually heal the land. What's so sad in reading this book is how over and over humans have just destroyed our land for a quick gain, never thinking of how this will impact the future. It's also frustrating to see over and over how we humans think we can change nature to suit our desires, never thinking nature knows best and if we work WITH nature instead of against it things are better for everyone - humans and animals alike. Thankfully beavers are still around and can still help heal the land - if people are willing to work with them instead of trying to force nature to work around what we want. A wonderfully well-written book about a fascinating animal that can truly heal much of the damage humans have done to our land.

Some quotes I liked:

"The weight of the [beaver] pond presses water deep into the ground, recharging aquifers for use by downstream farms and ranches. Sediment and pollutants filter out in the slackwaters, cleansing flows. Flood dissipate in the ponds; wildfires hiss out in wet meadows. Wetlands capture and store spring rain and snowmelt, releasing water in delayed pulses that sustain crops through the dry summer. A report released by a consulting firm in 2011 estimated that restoring beavers to a single river basin, Utah's Escalante, would provide tens of millions of dollars in benefits each year. Although you can argue with the wisdom of slapping a dollar value on nature, there's no denying that these are some seriously important critters." (p. 7)

"We are not accustomed to discussing the fur trade in the same breath as those earth-changing industries [like mining], but perhaps we should. The disappearance of beavers dried up wetlands and meadows, hastened erosion, altered the course of countless streams, and imperiled water-loving fish, fowl, and amphibians - an aquatic Dust Bowl...'[Beavers'] systematic and widespread removal,' wrote Sharon Brown and Suzanne Fouty in 2011, 'represents the first large-scale Euro-American alteration of watersheds.' If trapping out beavers ranked among humanity's earliest crimes against nature, bringing them back is a way to pay reparations. Beavers, the animal that doubles as an ecosystem, are ecological and hydrological Swiss Army knives, capable, in the right circumstances, of tackling just about any landscape-scale problem you might confront. Trying to mitigate floods or improve water quality? There's a beaver for that. Hoping to capture more water for agriculture in the face of climate change? Add a beaver. Concerned about sedimentation, salmon populations, wildfire? Take two families of beavers and check back in a year. If that all sounds hyperbolic to you, well, I'm going to spend this book trying to change your mind." (p. 9-10)

"'From here in the twenty-first century, we can look back and see that people then really did have a much more sophisticated understanding of their ecology than we recognize today,' LaPier said. Western scientists may have taken centuries to come around to the notion that beavers create life, but to the Blackfeet and other tribes the animal's vitality was always self-evident." (p. 47)

"In some ways beavers are akin to fire, a maligned and misunderstood disruption that society has quelled for decades, with disastrous ecological side effects. Brainwashed by Smokey Bear's hardline anti-wildfire agenda, only recently have we woken to the importance of allowing the woods to burn...In 2001 the ecologist Mark Harmon coined the word morticulture to connote the importance of snags, logs, and other forms of woody detritus long ignored by foresters. Beavers are adroit morticulturalists: One Finland-based study found that beavers created as much deadwood as windstorms and wildfires. Destruction is the preface to renewal; a force of death also breaths life." (p. 58-9)

"Our grandiose sense of self-worth - our human supremacy, as Derrick Jensen has put it - guides our every interaction with other species, from the livestock we raise for slaughter to the wild carnivores whose populations we fanatically control. To work with beavers is to recognize the limits of our own divinely bestowed domination, to acknowledge that the best thing we can do for many landscapes is to turn their salvation over to a mammal whose ecological vision diverges wildly from our own. Homo sapien's defining trait is our hubris; ceding our authority to beavers is an act of profound humility. Let the rodent do the work." (p. 243 - last few sentences of the book)

Big Love: the power of living with a wide-open heart by Scott Stabile

What happens when you dedicate your life to loving more? Lots of good things according to Scott Stabile. You may think Stabile must have had an easy life full of happiness to be so devoted to spreading love around, but that was not the case at all. When Stabile was 14 his parents were murdered at the grocery store they owned, then 9 years later his oldest brother overdosed on heroin, after that he was in a cult for 13 years before finally getting the courage to leave. He's also had other friends die or commit suicide and dealt with his own anxiety and shame. But what he learned through all the bad is that there IS good out there and being the good and looking for the good make all the difference. Sometimes you never know how one small act of kindness can impact someone for the rest of their life and Stabile encourages us all to do that more in our daily lives. A funny and upbeat look at how to see the best in a world that's still full of bad things.

Some quotes I liked:

"Healing isn't possible within denial and fear. It's only possible within openness and honesty, within our willingness to look at the truth of our reality, past and present, and to accept it for what it is without letting it define who we are right now. We are not our struggles, or our heartbreak...But, ultimately, who we are is who we decide to be, because of and despite everything we've been through." (p. 22-3)

"Change will always be scary. Fearlessness will always be a myth. We can be afraid and still make courageous choices. Courage doesn't even exist without an element of fear. It's action with fear that makes a choice brave." (p. 119)

[On not wanting children] "I can't begin to imagine what women who don't want children have to endure. I've felt like a monster because I've never wanted children, or worse, because I'm not even a fan of them. But I've never had my purpose for living questioned simply because I chose not to procreate...We're not all put on earth to parent children. Indeed, we're not even all put on earth to enjoy them very much. There's no shame in either of those things." (p. 195)

Simple Matters: living with less and ending up with more by Erin Boyle

There were mixed reviews on this one and some of the main complaints were that the author seems to be pushing for everyone to make their own cleaners and lotions. I felt like this was more of a manual on how to have a more simple life overall and how the author interprets that for her own life. Nowhere did I read anything that felt like this is how you MUST do things to be a good human being. She does talk about her own journey of simplicity and getting away from chemicals by making some of her own body lotions and cleaning products, but I felt like she wrote in a very non-judgmental way. There were a few things I couldn't relate to - only having one perfect throw blanket - nope. Only having one or two things on huge bare walls - again, not for me. A desk with only a computer and keyboard on it - again, no - where are your files, bills, stamps, etc. she never discusses that when talking about her desk. This is more of a simplifying manual for aspiring minimalists. I am NOT a minimalist and don't aspire to be, but I did like some of what she talked about in this book. Trying to make your home inspire you with beautiful things (regardless of how many things) instead of a bunch of cheap crap is fair and something I can definitely get behind. I did like this one, but Slow: simple living for a frantic world by Brooke McAlary definitely spoke to me more.

February 2019 Cookbooks

Cook90: the 30-day plan for faster, healthier, happier meals by David Tamarkin

I really like the premise of the Cook90 - cook every meal for 30 days to expand your cooking skills and try new recipes. I did think some of the rules were a little strict - you can't eat the same meal more than twice (except breakfast), eat leftovers no more than twice, and it doesn't count if someone else in your household cooks - you HAVE to cook part of the meal. But, I definitely think doing this would push you out of your comfort zone with cooking. I am a creature of habit, so it would be very hard for me to not have the same meal more than twice in a month. The first section of the book explains the Cook 90 plan and then the second section goes over how to plan this out and the importance of having a meal plan and creating "nextovers" parts of a meal that you purposely plan to use in another meal that week to cut down on prep work. The final section is the recipes and many of them give tips on how to best use all your ingredients for multiple meals. While I didn't see a ton of recipes I wanted to try, I do like the premise and will think about possibly doing my own Cook 90 in the future.

Damn Delicious Meal Prep by Chungah Rhee

I already really liked the Damn Delicious blog and had found lots of recipes I've tried and want to try. In this book she focuses on meal prep which helps create quick meals with whole foods. I really liked her meal prepping ideas and tools and she gives several examples of how to use one ingredient many ways for many different meals. That way you're not getting burned out eating the same meal over and over for several days. There were definitely lots of recipes I want to try in this one. If you're already a fan of Damn Delicious or just want some quick, good recipe ideas this is one to check out.

February 2019 Reviews

The Underground Railroad by Colson Whitehead (Books & Banter and Evening Edition)

Cora is a third-generation slave on a plantation in Georgia. When she is 10 years old her mother runs away and is assumed to be safe up North as she is never caught. Once her mother is gone life is even harder for Cora as a "stray" on the plantation - and daily life is brutal all the way around. After her master dies and his malicious brother takes over things become even more unbearable on the plantation. When Caesar, a newer slave, approaches Cora about running away she decides to go. The rest of the book is their harrowing journey on the underground railroad - which Whitehead imagines as an actual subterranean railroad. With stops in South Carolina, North Carolina, Tennessee, and Indiana every time things look like they are improving for Cora the bottom falls out - constantly on the run she is wary of making any personal attachments. But, the end of the book does look more promising for Cora without being too neatly wrapped up.

This is a hard book to review because while it is incredibly well-written the content is horrific and brutal. I'll never understand how slavery was accepted in the South (and all over the world), but this book shows just how depraved and evil humanity can be. And US slavery is just one chapter in the world's history of brutality and evil that still hasn't stopped being written. A hard read, but definitely worth it.

Hay Fever: how chasing a dream on a Vermont farm changed by life by Angela Miller

I thought this would be a really interesting book, but it was not that great. Angela Miller and her husband Rust just seem like gluttons for punishment and wasting money. He is a successful architect and she works in the publishing industry in New York City. They want to find a new rural "get-away" and come across Consider Bardwell Farm in Vermont and immediately both love it. Almost right away Angela wants to bring it back as a working goat farm and make cheese - but she knows nothing about raising goats or making cheese. So basically they throw money at the farm and hire a ton of employees to run things while they both continue to work full time and split their time between NYC and the farm. I understand running a working farm is very hard and it's very hard to be successful financially, but they just seemed to have more money than sense. I just really didn't like them and after awhile I just got frustrated with the book and all her complaints about employees and money problems. There are other much better farming books out there - don't waste your time on this one.

One quote I really disliked:

"As a matter of fact, the farm has triggered a talent I didn't know Rust had: landing government grants. That can be as important to the survival of today's family farm as producing children to provide free labor was in the past." (p. 133) Any business dependent on subsidies or government grants is NOT successful - just talk to Joel Salatin, Ben Hewitt, or Forrest Pritchard and read their books.

The Seasons on Henry's Farm by Terra Brockman

The Seasons on Henry's Farm is a week-by-week look at the running of an organic farm. Terra Brockman's parents bought what they all called "the Land" in the early 1970's. They eventually moved there full time, but now it's being run by Terra's brother Henry. Three of the five siblings have moved back to the farm or the farm area and all work together on Henry's farm. Terra had taken over writing the weekly email "farm notes" that eventually turned into this book - what's in season, what they're planting, and other farm events/happenings. There is SO MUCH WORK involved in running a full-time farm that at times just reading this book made me anxious! Even in the winter there is work to do they only really get "time off" December through February and even then there are still things to do to prepare for spring planting again. It definitely makes you appreciate that there are people who are willing to do this very difficult and often low-paying job so that we have fresh, healthy food to eat. Each chapter also includes at few recipes using some of the ingredients discussed in that chapter. Overall, an interesting and insightful look at the day-to-day operations of an organic vegetable farm.

Life's Work: a moral argument for choice by Dr. Willie Parker

I decided to read this book after seeing Jodi Picoult speak on her Spark of Light tour. She loosely based the doctor and clinic in her book on Dr. Parker and the sole Mississippi abortion clinic where he rotates working. While I was already more on the pro-choice side of the issue, he does make a good argument from a doctor's viewpoint that abortions are part of women's reproductive care and shouldn't be unduly hard to get. He also points out that the anti-abortion advocates are also more likely to want to restrict all aspects of reproductive control for women. There are so many other issues related to abortion that it's hard to see this issue as just black or white. Definitely a unique look at a hard issue.

Some quotes I liked:

"In the late seventies, a small but powerful alliance of Protestants, Catholics, and political strategists intent on putting Ronald Reagan in the White House came up with a cynical plan. By framing abortion as the most important threat in a broad secular assault on 'family values' - and using rhetoric of the 'sanctity of life' lifted directly from the Roman Catholic catechism - a group of what were essentially lobbyists found they could mobilize conservative voters throughout the Bible Belt, millions of citizens who had previously been politically passive and who regarded the polls as profane. The public face of this alliance was an organization called the Moral Majority, led by a fundamentalist Christian pastor from Virginia named Jerry Falwell, who conflated religion and politics by preaching that abortion was murder, and that the moral duty of a good and faithful Christian was to declare him- or herself to be 'pro-life.' It was, perhaps, the most successful marketing campaign ever launched in the political sphere, creating legions of single-issue voters who would stand in line at the polls in any weather to elect pro-life candidates." (p. 120-1)

"This sacralization of motherhood in every sector of the privileged classes enables a widespread social conservatism that, at base, diminishes women's liberty: a consensus that motherhood is a woman's most important role." (p. 178)

The Comfort Food Diaries: my quest for the perfect dish to mend a broken heart by Emily Nunn

I liked the premise of this book, but it was definitely darker than I was expecting. Emily Nunn was engaged and living with her fiancee and his daughter who Emily loved. She had been laid off from her job, but was able to rely on her fiancee to support her while she did more of the domestic side of things. But when her closest sibling Oliver commits suicide Emily goes into a tailspin. Her grief exposed the cracks in her relationship as well, as her fiancee thinks she should "be over" it by now. Emily (and Oliver) had struggled with alcoholism before and now she just succumbs to constant drinking to cope. After she and her fiancee break up she ends up checking herself into a psychiatric hospital and from there rehab. Before her hospitalization she drunkenly posted on Facebook about how her life was falling apart and was surprised by the kind reactions she got from far-flung friends and family. After rehab she goes on what she dubs the Comfort Food Tour where she meets up with family and friends to cook and heal through food. Emily is the 4th of 5 children and grew up in a very dysfunctional family. Her mother and younger sister didn't even come to Oliver's funeral and off and on her older sister Elaine cuts off contact with her for no reason - a common occurrence in their family. So, during the Comfort Food Tour Emily does reconnect with some non-immediate family and old friends. She finds that she not only has to grieve for Oliver and the life she thought she was going to have with her fiancee, but also grieve the family she desperately wanted that is never going to be what she needs or wants. But, along the way she begins to create a new family of people who do support her and do want the best for her and there are also lots of recipes included throughout the book. While it was darker than I initially thought it would be it was an amazing book that explores the power of food to heal us and how to break the dysfunctional chains of your past.

Some quotes I liked:

"How does a person make choices about relationships, ones that might lead to a stable happy family, when she's never been given a recipe that makes any kind of sense at all? And how does she learn to let go of the bad recipe, even though it's a family heirloom?" (p. 38)

"When Mariah's [Emily's aunt] older brother Richard was a medic in a naval hospital during World War II, Edith contacted his commanding officer and said, 'We do not know how to work the planting machine. Could you let my son Richard come home?' Instead, he sent a busload of seamen. They came every year until the war ended to plant peanuts, cotton, and tobacco. And after the war was over, that officer and his friends came back to hunt on the family property along the Nottoway." (p. 166)

"But at this moment, miraculously, I felt relieved in a way I never had before. And I would come back to it for comfort, again and again. Because I finally realized that trying to understand my family's bizarre patterns of devaluing and discarding people closest to them was so much less important than realizing that the patterns were just that - a systemic dysfunction - and that I could escape the system." (p. 292)

The Dreamers by Karen Thompson Walker

One day a young woman just starting college feels sick and goes to sleep - but can't be woken up. Not long afterward she dies. Then two more girls on the same floor fall asleep and can't wake up, then more until the small town of Santa Lora, California is under complete quarantine with check-points and military vehicles delivering supplies. As the sickness spreads and no one can figure out why some succumb and others don't, the townspeople have varying reactions - some panic while others just go on with their normal lives as best they can. The story is built around a few main characters - Mei, who's roommate is the first to get the sickness, Ben, Annie and their baby daughter Grace, who are new to town and parenthood, and Libby and Sara, two sisters living with a prepping father who's been planning for something like this for years. But, no one is immune to the sickness and everyone in the story is affected. Similar to The Age of Miracles the story explores people's reactions to a disaster, as well as just the ordinary lives of the characters. Incredibly well-written, I could NOT put this one down. I can't wait to see what Walker writes next!

The Grace of Enough: pursuing less and living more in a throwaway culture by Haley Stewart

Stewart and her husband had 3 young children when they decided to sell their house in Florida and move to Texas to intern on a farm for a year and all live in a 600 square foot apartment. Leading up to and during that year they began to re-assess what they wanted for their family. Did they want to work more and more hours to barely see each other, but achieve the "American dream?" Or did they want to take a more radical faith-based step to live with less and fight against the tide of our throwaway culture. Each chapter talks about an area of their lives or their Catholic calling and how they made changes to live more authentically. I didn't realize when I put this book on hold that it was from a Catholic perspective. Not that that would have completely turned me off from it, but it was VERY much Catholic-focused. I am a Christian, but I don't like the Catholic Church and I especially don't want the pope telling me I shouldn't use birth control - Stewart and her husband don't and there's a chapter about that (during which I rolled my eyes a lot). There are some good tips and ideals, but it was VERY Catholic heavy which didn't speak to me at all.

January 2019 Reviews

Educated by Tara Westover (Books & Banter)

The first time Tara Westover heard of the Holocaust she was in a college classroom. Westover grew up the youngest of seven children born to survivalist Mormon parents. Westover's father owned a scrap metal yard and sometimes worked construction and her mother was a midwife and herbalist. They didn't believe in public education or modern medicine - all the children were homeschooled, but mostly that meant working either in the scrap yard or in the kitchen (but only for Tara and her sister since women belong in the kitchen). This is the life Tara sees herself living as an adult since she knows nothing else. But when her older brother Tyler gets into college he opens the door to her as well. He encourages her to take the ACT and after teaching herself enough math to pass she is accepted to BYU. Once in college Tara begins to see that almost everything she was taught by her parents was wrong, but by reading and studying Tara begins to open more doors for herself through education. But, going home between semesters gets harder and harder as she begins to see her family and life growing up through new eyes - her father is very likely bipolar and her brother Shawn is violently abusive to everyone in his path (and it's excused away by her family time and time again). Finally after Shawn repeatedly threatens to kill her she is cut off by her family - she didn't cut them off THEY cut her off as she is obviously demon-possessed for wanting Shawn to address his issues. She is able to maintain a relationship with two of her brothers - both of whom are educated and aren't financially tied to the family businesses. In the same vein of The Glass Castle, it's a miracle that Westover is able to get out of her family and graduate with a PhD, but Westover's childhood was much more abusive. It's really a miracle that all seven children lived into adulthood with the horrific accidents and injuries that happened to most of them - only going to the hospital with the direst of injuries and often not even then. Westover shows the value of education through her life story and is an inspiration.

Some quotes I liked:

"'I know you think we're being unfair,' she said. 'but when I was your age I was living on my own, getting ready to marry your father.' 'You were married at sixteen?' I said. 'Don't be silly,' she said. 'You are not sixteen.' I stared at her. She stared at me. 'Yes, I am. I'm sixteen.' She looked me over. 'You're at least twenty.' She cocked her head. 'Aren't you?' We were silent. My heart pounded in my chest. 'I turned sixteen in September,' I said. 'Oh.' Mother bit her lip, then she stood and smiled. 'Well, don't worry about it then. You can stay. Don't know what your dad was thinking, really. I guess we forgot. Hard to keep track of how old you kids are.'" (p. 137)

"...I had finally begun to grasp something that should have been immediately apparent: that someone had opposed the great march toward equality; someone had been the person from whom freedom had to be wrested. I did not think of my brother as that person; I doubt I will ever think of him that way. But something had shifted nonetheless. I had started on a path of awareness, had perceived something elemental about my brother, my father, myself. I had discerned the ways in which we had been sculpted by a tradition given to us by others, a tradition of which we were either willfully or accidentally ignorant. I had begun to understand that we had lent our voices to a discourse whose sole purpose was to dehumanize and brutalize others - because nurturing that discourse was easier, because retaining power always feelslike the way forward." (p. 180)

"'I have been teaching in Cambridge for thirty years,' he said. 'And this is one of the best essays I've read.' I was prepared for insults but not for this...I could tolerate any form of cruelty better than kindness. Praise was a poison to me; I choked on it. I wanted the professor to shout at me, wanted it so deeply I felt dizzy from the deprivation." (p. 240)

"I'd never heard anyone use the word 'feminism' as anything but a reprimand. At BYU, 'You sound like a feminist' signaled the end of the argument. It also signaled that I had lost." (p. 258)

"Everything I had worked for, all my years of study, had been to purchase for myself this one privilege: to see and experience more truths than those given to me by my father, and to use those truths to construct my own mind. I had come to believe that the ability to evaluate many ideas, many histories, many points of view, was at the heart of what it means to self-create. If I yielded now, I would lose more than an argument. I would lose custody of my own mind. This was the price I was being asked to pay, I understood that now. What my father wanted to cast from me wasn't a demon: it was me." (p. 304)

"I didn't understand it then, and I don't understand it now, but there was something nourishing in setting aside that time each week, in the act of admitting that I needed something I could not provide for myself." (p. 316)

"Now I thought about it, I realized that all my siblings, except Richard and Tyler, were economically dependent on my parents. My family was splitting down the middle - the three who had left the mountain, and the four who had stayed. The three with doctorates, and the four without high school diplomas. A chasm had appeared, and was growing." (p. 326)

The Great Alone by Kristin Hannah (Evening Edition)

It's 1974 and 13-year-old Leni's parents are packing up a VW Bus to drive to Alaska. Her father Ernt just found out that his army buddy who died in Vietnam left his Alaskan homestead to him. Ever since Ernt came home after being a POW in Vietnam nothing has been the same. He drinks too much and can't keep a job, so they move from place to place always seeking a fresh start where "things will be different this time." But Alaska is not for the weak. With help from some neighbors the Allbrights make it through their first year in Alaska, but the severe cold and long nights don't help Ernt's issues. He is becoming more and more violent and controlling and everything explodes one night. Leni and her mother flee Alaska leaving behind more than they can imagine.

So, this is the second Kristin Hannah book I've read and they both follow the same formula - good story idea + LOTS of melodrama + every single thread is neatly wrapped up perfectly at the end. Yes, there was violence and bad situations, but just like in The Nightingale it's like a Lifetime TV movie version of something that could have been great. 

*Spoiler Alert*

Seriously the Dad's name is Ernt - what kind of ridiculous name is that?! Why not Ernest or Ernie? Are there any real Ernt's out there? Also, there is no way in hell this family would have made it through the first year in Alaska. In just a few years they have become true, hard-core Alaskans and Ernt is telling newcomers to go back home - oh, you mean where YOU came from like 2 years ago?! The first red flag of too-neat storylines was the "intervention" Tom Walker and Marge had with Ernt - that would NEVER have happened after literally EVERY character talks about how you can do whatever you want in Alaska and everyone will leave you alone - well, I guess everything but beat your wife. While it did make for a tear-jerker ending, what happened with Leni and Matthew almost dying, then being reunited with their son years later is so unbelievably unrealistic. More realistic (and sad) would have been Matthew dying, then Leni and their son coming back to live with Tom later. It was just too much. I'm sure my book club will LOVE this one as they LOVED The Nightingale, but I'm done with Kristin Hannah after this one.

Crash Override by Zoe Quinn

Zoe Quinn was a game developer who was mass cyber-attacked by her ex-boyfriend when she broke up with him. Thinking it would only go on for a few weeks she tried to fight back as best she could, reporting all the vile comments to whatever medium it was on. She quickly realized this was something different, the abuse wasn't stopping and the threats were all-too real. She and her currently boyfriend lost jobs and couldn't go home due to the death and rape threats she was receiving not just daily, by almost every minute of every day. So how did this happen? Why wouldn't tech giants like Twitter or Google DO anything to stop this violent assault? That's what Quinn explores in this book. She tells her story and throughout she also includes information about why tech companies don't want to ban people or have more thoughtful security measures. Based on her horrific experience (that's still going on just on a smaller scale) she gives tips on how to protect your online life and also what to do if you become a target of the internet hate-mobs. I remember this story when it came out, but unfortunately like many terrible stories you think, 'Wow. That sucks, good for her for trying to fight back.' and you go on your merry way not thinking about the aftermath for her. This book exposes the aftermath for Quinn, but also how real the threat of internet hate-mobs is for anyone. Like anything else the internet can be great, but Quinn's story shows how quickly it can turn VERY ugly. Good for her for not only fight back and trying to help other people avoid what she went through, but also good for her for going back to what she loves - making video games.

Some quotes I liked:

"Our culture has systematically failed to help victims of online harassment while simultaneously leaving it up to them to fix those same failing systems with little or no support. Law enforcement, lawmakers, and private corporations have done little more than shrug their shoulders, telling me and other victims to just get offline - and cede the internet to those who want to use it only to hurt people. The longer I spent trying to change these systems from within, the more I found that they were constructed from the ground up to resist effective change. You can hear the same nonexcuses from people in power only so many times before realizing that they know how broken things are, and that they're not going to change." (p. 6)

"Two years and countless angry video rants and blog posts later, I have a deeper understanding than I could possibly have wanted. These pundits are community leaders of a sort - they validate feelings and provide guidance. Internet Inquisitors position themselves as authority figures and truth tellers; they confirm the mob's hatred, paranoia, and insecurities and direct it toward the nearest combustible witch on their radar. They serve as morale boosters, assuring the mob that they are correct, that their path is righteous, and that it's the world that's wrong (or in this case, the person they're offering up as a sacrifice). Without leadership, a ragtag group of people who make being an asshole their hobby will usually fall apart from infighting or get bored in a short period. It's hard for an anonymous mob to coordinate itself - someone has to do a bit of cat herding." (p. 61-2)

"Generally speaking, the bigger the following someone has, the less interested a service is in banning them. Platforms like YouTube thrive on traffic, and crowdfunding sites like Go-FundMe get a percentage of the funds raised. The incentives for these companies to remove abusive users are not as compelling as they should be. I want to believe that it's not intentional, but it's hard to understand why episodes of Game of Thrones are wiped from places like YouTube within nanoseconds while chronic abusive users are allowed to flourish." (p. 64)

"The indifference and inaction of platforms like YouTube in response to abuse, which is supposedly against their Terms of Service, makes it hard for victims to feel anything but despair. The abuse is public, people are profiting, and no one will do anything." (p. 65)

"Almost all the reports came back an unactionable, and the light died in me a little. It's hard to express the toll it takes on you to spend so much time sifting through sewage, but when you're sure the effort is worth something, that it'll help someone who needs it, you can bear it. When you have a direct line to a person who can help, and they don't care, it crushes you." (p.132-3)

Coming to My Senses by Alice Waters

I almost didn't read this one based on all the mixed/bad reviews and now that I finally finished it I wish I hadn't wasted my time. As another reviewer said, this book skipped over all the best parts - her marriage and child, running the restaurant for over 40 years, the Edible Schoolyard project - all the things Alice Waters is known for. Instead the book almost seems like a weird stream-of-consciousness about her childhood and all the important/funky/artistic people she knew in the 60's and 70's. I did like the first half that was more about her childhood and up to the point in college where she went to France, but the rest was pretty boring. She also made it seem like starting a restaurant was just a whim that has somehow been successful. If I didn't know who she was I would have wondered how this book ever got published. I would not recommend this one at all.

The Angry Chef''s Guide to Spotting Bullshit in the World of Food by Anthony Warner

Why does chef Anthony Warner go by "the angry chef"? He's tired of food bullsh*t and pseudoscience masquerading as truth and fact. In this book he discusses pseudoscience and why it's so easy to convince people that a certain diet is THE way to lose weight/be healthy/live your best life/etc. It was really interesting when he discussed why our brains are wired to want connections and simple explanations when nutritional science is not always that simple. He takes on many popular diet trends like keto, paleo, and detoxing and basically rips the pseudoscience behind them apart. While I didn't agree with every word he said, for the most part I was already on his side before I even read the book. He does a great job explaining the bits of science that are used to create trends and why they aren't right and in some cases can even be dangerous to follow. If you miss bread or want to enjoy a cupcake every once in awhile the angry chef agrees. His diet advice is to eat in moderation and eat a varied diet - cutting out whole food groups is NOT good. If you're not sure where to turn with all the various diets and superfoods out there give this book a try and see if you agree with The Angry Chef's Guide to Spotting Bullsh*t in the World of Food.

The Angry Chef's Rules for Spotting Bullsh*t in Food
1) They will have a food philosophy.
2) They will try to sell you detox.
3) They will tell you that your illness is your own fault.
4) They will fit the health-blogger template.
5) They will tell you that the truth is not up for debate.
6) They will talk about superfoods.
7) They will use anecdotes as evidence.
8) They will quote ancient wisdoms at you as fact.
9) They will tell you things were better "back then."
10) They will tell you all these things with great certainty.

Some quotes I liked:

"I generally pride myself on an ability to pick apart the misunderstandings and confusions that result in false beliefs being born, but in the case of detox diets and detox products, there is no mystery to pick apart. Despite it being a multibillion-dollar industry, no clinical study has shown any commercially available detox diet or treatment to have any clinical effect in the removal of toxins." (p. 25)

[Best subheading EVER] "WTF is wrong with potatoes" (p.121)
"If you cannot fit potatoes into a healthy balanced diet, there is something wrong with the way you are eating. They are a near perfect food, and to create rules that exclude them not only feels wrong, it is wrong." (p. 123)

"Sugar is just sugar. It is not good or bad. It is only toxic if you eat too much of it, and by that measure all food is toxic (remember the does makes the poison: you can die from drinking too much water)...To attach the language of toxicity and addiction to a food we literally cannot avoid means pouring vitriol and scorn on all of us...If you are not sugar-free, if your children are not sugar-free, then you are toxic, you are contaminated. You and your kin are foul and pestilent junkies, no longer worthy, no longer deserving of medical treatment, contaminated and beyond hope, destined to die fat, lonely, miserable, and addicted." (p. 149)

"Sugar is important. It is the sweetness of freshly picked peas. It is in the bliss of strawberries warmed by the sun. The sweetness of foods can enrich our lives; it can bring us joy and pleasure. Sweetness is a vital part of the flavor palette of every cook and true sweetness comes only from sugar...To dismiss and reject the use of sugar because of false notions of toxicity is to misunderstand what it is to eat healthily. A healthy diet is one of joy, not one of rejection and denial." (p. 151)

"Social media creates many closed, self-affirming populations capable of perpetuating and reinforcing falsehoods. Ideas don't have to travel the world to do a lot of damage." (p. 281)

Dopsick: dealers, doctors, and the drug company that addicted America by Beth Macy

In Dopesick Beth Macy delves into the opioid epidemic that has been sweeping through the country for the past 20 years. She explores small towns in Appalachia where opioid addictions started with injured and disabled former coal miners that now have teens dying of overdoses almost daily. She meets up with a convicted drug dealer who moved from Baltimore into the small town of Woodstock, Virginia because he could make more money with less competition than in Baltimore. Macy also exposes the grief of parents whose children died, sometimes the first time they ever used opioids. While a lot of the statistics are overwhelming Macy finds small pockets of doctors and nurses working in free clinics to try to help the poorest of the poor fight their addictions and also fight back against the drug companies that pushed opioids on unsuspecting patients. The most frustrating part of the book was reading about how Oxycontin was created and then relentlessly pushed on doctors and patients even when doctors were reporting accidental addictions just from patients taking the medication as prescribed. This just further highlights how money trumps everything. The huge amounts of money and bonuses made from Oxycontin in the pharmaceutical world was why no one cared when people started abusing these drugs and dying. Even now after all the media attention about opioids there are still doctors thoughtlessly prescribing 30-60 supplies of opioids to patients who don't need that level of painkiller. A very eye-opening and sad look at an on-going health crisis in America.

Some quotes I liked:

"The Harrison Narcotics Act of 1914 severely restricted the sale and possession of heroin and other narcotic drugs, and by 1924 the manufacture of heroin was outlawed, twenty-six years after Bayer's pill came to market. By the thirties, typical heroin users were working-class, and many of them were children of immigrants, along with a growing number of jazz musicians and other creative types, all now reliant on criminal drug networks to feed their vicious habit - and keep their dopesickness at bay. The addicted were now termed 'junkies,' inner-city users who supported their habit by collecting and selling scrap metal. The 'respectable' upper- and middle-class opium and morphine addicts having died out, the remaining addicted were reclassified as criminals, not patients." (p. 25-6)

"Van Zee didn't yet grasp what was truly driving the furious rate of overprescription. Sales-rep bonuses were growing exponentially, from $1 million in 1996, the year OxyContin hit the market, to $40 million in 2001...Purdue conducted more than forty national pain management and speaker-training conferences, luring doctors to resorts from Boca Raton, Florida, to Scottsdale, Arizona...More than five thousand doctors, nurses, and pharmacists attended the conferences during the drug's first five years - all expenses paid." (p. 47)

"What in fact was the addiction rate among those prescribed opioids for chronic nonmalignant pain? More recent studies - not letters to the editor penned in 1980 - put the figure as high as 56 percent." (p. 95)

"Though his mother, Ginger Mumpower, had sent him to fifteen different rehab facilities, for eight years Spencer managed to use and sell drugs before his name ever entered a police blotter...As his counselor Vinnie Dabney remembered it, 'Fifteen rehabs had not convinced Spencer that it was not in his best interests to get high. It took time in jail and a friend dying before he could decide he wanted to change.'" (p. 117-8)

"Emergency-room administrator Dr. John Burton watched the cultural shift play out at the North Carolina YMCA summer camp he attended as a kid and returned to later as the camp doctor. Whereas very few campers took prescribed medications in the 1970's, by the mid-1990s 10 percent were taking a pill at some point during the day - most for asthma or allergy conditions, followed by a small set of kids on behavioral medications, usually for ADHD. By 2012, fully one-third of his campers were on meds, mostly ADHD medications, antidepressants, and antipsychotics. 'What happens is, we've changed our whole culture, from one where kids don't take pills at all to one where you've got a third or more of kids who are on pills to stay well because of what are believed to be chronic health conditions,' Burton said. 'They get so used to taking pills that eventually they end up using them for a recreational high.'" (p. 135)

"Why had blacks failed to become ensnared in opioid addiction? That question was addressed in 2014 data issued by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention: Doctors didn't trust people of color not to abuse opioids, so they prescribed them painkillers at far lower rates than they did whites. 'It's a case where racial stereotyping actually seems to be having a protective effect,' marveled researcher Dr. Andrew Kolodny of Brandeis University. Put another way: By 2014, while young whites were dying of overdose at a rate three times higher than they did in 2002, the death rate for people of color was relatively unchanged." (p. 253-4)

Farm From Home by Amanda Brooks

I thought I was really going to like this book based on the description - a family living in New York City feels like their life is too hectic and decide to take a one year sabbatical to the father's family farm in England, but never come back to NY and stay on the farm full time. The book is set up by months starting in June, which was the month they moved to England. Each month Brooks takes readers through what that month is typically like on the farm - activities, recipes, photos, etc. About half-way through she started to get on my nerves. They obviously have TONS of money - living on the farm with not much talk of jobs or income and keeping their NY apartment too. They also travel and frequently go "somewhere tropical" during the coldest part of winter. Maybe I just don't understand it, but the chapter on fox hunting and the social importance of hunting (not actual hunting for food, but horseback riding that's "hunting" now a fox scent since actual fox hunting is illegal) seemed so elitist and terrible. That kind of turned me off to the book as a whole. While I like the idea of taking a sabbatical from city life and living on a working farm, this was more of farming as an English hobby which was off-putting to me. I gave it 3 stars though because the photographs are beautiful and the chapter with all the baby animal pictures was worth looking through the book for. Overall, I would skip this one for actual farm memoirs or better memoirs about leaving hectic city life for a simpler life.

2018 Year in Reading

In 2018 I challenged myself to read 100 books and I surpassed that by reading 101! I also read 39 cookbooks. Here are my Top 10 books by category:

Fiction

The Woman in the Window by A.J. Finn
Every Note Played by Lisa Genova
All We Ever Wanted by Emily Giffin
Still Me by Jojo Moyes
The Tea Girl of Hummingbird Lane by Lisa See


Non-fiction

Nomadland: surviving America in the twenty-first century by Jessica Bruder
The Year of Less by Cait Flanders
Slow: simple living for a frantic world by Brook McAlary
Modified: GMOs and the threat to our food, our land, our future by Caitlin Shetterly
Hillbilly Elegy: a memoir of a family and culture in crisis by J.D. Vance


Cookbooks

Canning in the Modern Kitchen by Jamie Dement
Little Everyday Cakes by Candace Floyd
Once Upon a Chef by Jennifer Segal
Platters and Boards by Shelly Westerhausen
For the Love of the South by Amber Wilson